Friday, April 23, 2010

birthdays, birthdays and more birthdays

This week was Brycen's birthday, he turned 5, when we got pregnant we weren't intending to, we were discussing having a 4 child but had come up with LOTS of reasons not to. (in our defence the only child we planned to get pregnant with and by planned I mean decided to get pregnant this month so that the baby would be born when we wanted and actually tried to get pregnant. We miscarried at 8 weeks and were heartbroken)

The miscarriage happened April 23 , 1999 10 months after the loss of Mackenzie, we have named this baby Alexander Joshua just because I need to. It was a Wednesday night I was home alone Jeff and Ashton went to Awana ( a children's bible club) we knew something was wrong I had started spotting on Sunday spent Monday at the doctors stayed on bed rest for the rest of Monday and Tuesday, went back to work Wednesday the spotting started again and we had an emergency ultrasound on Wednesday lost the baby wendeady night home all by myself. I went back to work the next day, then on Friday Jeff had a planned men's retreat weekend I dropped him off with his uncle then went to the cemetery and sat with Mackenzie and Cried. Normally the owner of the cemetery would come over and chat I guess he realized I needed to be alone, I don't know how long I sat there but I did finally go home. in that moment I had once again lost all my hopes and dreams for my family I was now a dead baby Momma times two and EVERYONE knew we were expecting now we had to tell them that yet again i had failed and the baby was dead. We did not want to try again, we were gonna start the pill the next month, I had to go in and have an ultrasound again to make sure the baby was totally gone, at this ultrasound there was nothing all though the tech said at the last ultrasound there had been two sacks ( what does that mean was it twins???) now nothing and she showed me where I was gonna ovulate from next month (this happens to be Tony) yup we got pregnant again before I could start the pill.

Maybe this is why I have been feeling down in the last few days it has been 12 years since i lost my third baby.

Okay so this started as a post of Brycen's birthday and has somehow turned into Alex's birth story it amazes me that I can miss people that I don't know so much.

We did not plan to get pregnant but we did Brycen's pregnancy was the hardest. I had gestational diabetes I had to test my sugars 4 times a day ( it was VERY expensive) I had to inject insulin twice a day. I had a fetal assessment every week on the same day I could change the time but not the day. We had to see how fast he was growing i was So scared after an UN explained stillbirth and now the diabetes I didn't like the odds of my change for another loss. At 26 weeks I had the stomach flu it was so bad I couldn't keep anything down and ended u in the hospital hooked up to an I.V. and having had a shot of Demerol because I couldn't sleep and was having constant contractions. Once re hydrated my contractions stopped and I was allowed to go home ( since it was Easter Sunday , we went to my Mom and Dad's place the family Had dinner and I took gravel and slept That is the only year I have not had to hunt for my Easter bunny) Needless to say the next week I spent getting ready for this baby I made PILES of food for the freezer so once he came I didn't have to worry about dinners. At 37 weeks the doctor thinned my membranes at my appointment and I started contracting and since I had an induction scheduled for the next week I thought nothing of it. That was on til I talked to a friend and told her what had happened and she informed me that everyone she knew that had had that done had their babies that day. I had been having contractions all day from the time of my appointment but had brushed them off after all I was only 37 weeks. Well I started to pay attention and guess what yup a pattern. I called my Mom and told her I think I'm in labour and the panic began. I lived roughly 1.5 hours from the hospital I was to deliver in and a good 20 inutes from the closet hospital, I was home alone with the other children (3 of them ages 3, 5, and 9) and I did not have a car. Of course Mom says you have to call Jeff so i do and he wants to come home. I tell him not to because I am not known for quick labours. I realize that I have to lead singing at church on Sunday so I call the women how offered to sing for me if Ineeded. she laughs at me because i am worried about this while in labour. My Mom phones every few minutes to make sure things are okay. She wants to come get me and take me to her place. I would rather stay home and labour at home. Finally she convinces me that my sister come stay at my house just in case ( she had an exam the next day and needed to study and wanted to be in delivery with us along with my sister in law) she comes over and studies in my bedroom I go about doing everything I normally do. At one point J'naya had an accident in her pants and I have to clean up the mess, dunning a contraction that at this point is making me catch my breath. I decided to do laundry putting the laundry basket on the floor by my feet so that I have to bend down and pick up each piece to fold it, my sister comes out and yells at me telling me she'll carry it to the table so that I don't have to bend down to which I in from her I did this on purpose if this is gonna happen might as well help it along.

Finally I inform my sister that I think my water broke (all my babies have come within 30 minutes of my water breaking so now everyone is panicked ) she phone my parents to let them know the kids are coming I phones Jeff and tell him to meet us at my Mom's I think my Mom phoned my brother and sister in law. When we get to my parents Jeff is already there. He doesn't want me to go inside my parents meet us in the driveway and they are all trying to push me into the van. I inform them that need to go to the bathroom and am not leaving till I have done so. You should have seen that panic on my Mom's face ( she was at the birth of the other children she knows how quickly this can happen once my water breaks, and he had my sister in 45 minutes and almost didn't make it to the hospital) I go in and use the bathroom and when I come out there they all are standing around waiting for my I start laughing while holding on to the wall cause it hurts. They weren't happy that I was still there. I go get in the van and we head for the hospital.

My sister in law, sister and Jeff are all there, my water has not broken. I walk the halls ane tell the nurse not to ask me about pain meds because i don't want them and if asked I will change my mind and I really don't want them I can do this. At some point it is decided that my sister in law will go home but Kathleen stays. Jeff and Kathleen laugh and joke ( mainly about messing with my bed) the contractions are getting VERY close and VERY hard every time a contraction starts I start crying not really crying but the tears start streaming. I realize that Jeff and Kathleen are suddenly quiet. Jeff finally says i can't do this anymore and asks the nurse for and epidural, the epi arrives quickly and I feel much better. In the am I A.M. getting Close Jeff calls Heater and lets her know that if she still wishes to be at the birth she better hurry. Heather comes back and at 10:38 am our beautiful little boy comes into the world screaming, this is the first time Jeff has seen a baby actually born (he doesn't do blood and guts well) as this was his last chance to watch his child enter the world. Kathleen has tears running down her face and Heather looks amazed. They all take turns holding him and I watch ( I always get the shakes really badly in the final stages of labour). Suddenly there is a phone call and the nurse comes in and tells Kathleen that her Mom is here does she want to step out and talk to her I inform her that this is also my Mom can she bring the kids up and meet their new brother and grandson The nurse tells me that if it's okay with me it's okay with her. I ask that a blanket get thrown over that bed so the kids don't get scared by the blood and in they come. It was a short visit but they al got a chance to meet him. Then things quiet down and I am left alone with my new son and the nurse. I get moved to my room and I here the nurse tell nurse on the postpartum ward that she's bringing over a Mrs. Reimer but no worries she's very expericned and knows what she's doing ( you think this is baby number 5 ;-) )

Brycen Cole was born April 19, 2005 at 10:38 am weighing in at 8 lbs. 7 0z. and cute as a button.

My Mom says that God gave us Brycen because he knew we had hard times coming and we would need something to laugh at and i think she's right he's ALWAYS doing something to make us laugh ( however we won't go into the things that he does to scare us like poisoning himself and putting a button up his nose!!! for more baby bear stories click on baby bear)

We love our babybear a.k.a stink or Brycen.

1 comment:

ter@waaoms said...

I always forget that Brycen s the same age as my little girl, and that they have the same nickname, "babybear" Happy birthday, Brycen.